I decided to get a little personal on the blog today to discuss the delicate nature of LDFs and a few tips at how to maintain them! After moving around the US over the past few years, my friendships have dwindled and changed, but the ones worth fighting for remain. I am an only child and cherish my alone time and really dislike talking on the phone (a habit I am trying to break).
Let me introduce to that lovely gal in the picture above. We have known each other since the first grade and, since we are both only children, we eventually adopted the other as a sister. She has stood by my side through the good, the bad and the ugly. Cassie and I have not lived in the same state since high school, as I went to UCLA for undergrad, and C went to University of Arizona. C is an environmental scientist and has three masters degrees from U of A too!! My level of proudness is just staggering. She is my token LDF and will always be my MOH when the time has come.
1. Call as often as you can. This will be tough and life will get in the way, but at least make the effort.
2. Get used to FOMO. After I moved away from SF, all my best friends kept on with their lives as they should. I moped for a bit as I missed the laughter, inside jokes and “I am dropping over for a glass of wine” mentality of SF.
3. Remember the important days! Whether it be Valentine’s day or a birthday, always just shoot a text… In my experience usually my texts with friends are filled with emojis and not so many words.
4. Hold onto the friendships that are worth fighting for. An LDF is filled with difficulties, both a sense of missing the other person and a slight worry that they might replace you with someone closer. Most importantly, LDFs are not physically a part of your daily life. My rule of thumb is always to remember that they are always there even if they cannot come over for a glass of wine!
5. E-mail weekly updates. C and I started this a few months back. Although we have not been fabulous about actually staying true to this (mostly I have dropped the ball), this is a great way to stay involved.
6. Cherish the time you do have together. C and I have had some fabulous times in the past, such as our girls weekend this last spring where we wore Lilly and drank champagne. On top of that, we went shark diving after our high school graduation on our trip to Hawaii!
7. Remember not every friendship is the same, but equally as wonderful. Each of my friends are so unique its uncanny. Each person is in your life for a reason and just always remember the fond memories you share and revel in their uniqueness.
8. Always be there for them! When my dad passed away (a post to come about that later), Cassie was a great support. Her mom spoke at my fathers memorial about a great pair of red glasses he wore and I remember only wanting to sit with Cassie and talk about things other than what was happening. A year later on the anniversary, she sent such a lovely bouquet of flowers that I truly cried when I received them. This little token of sweetness made that difficult day all the more beautiful.
What are some things you do to maintain your LDFs?
Cheers,
Maggie
Leave a Reply